DOSE:
500 mg
oral
Opium
400 mg
insufflated
Ketamine
(powder / crystals)
BODY WEIGHT:
82 kg
Last night I had the most incredible experience on Ketamine. I must have snorted about 400mg but used a saline nasal spray a few minutes afterwards to properly dissolve the crystals. What followed was the most intense drug experience I have a had in years, and also one of the most comforting.
It's difficult, if not impossible to truly describe it, and I need to rely to a large extent on other's accounts of their strong K trips as I simply don't have the words to describe it however, I can say that within a few seconds of using the saline spray, I was gone gone, so far gone into a weirdly electronic world � it was first as if I was getting further and further away from my keyboard and desk. I could see my hands as I was trying to type but the chemical was drawing me away fast. Then I closed my eyes, and had the experience that 'it' was finally happening. That I could not resist at all, that the only option was simply to give in and trust to the trip.
That feeling of 'it' happening was unreal. But it was also intensely real. My body was totally calm and tranquillised, I was rushing through time at a tremendous pace� nearer and nearer to the speed of light, and yet perfectly, unnervingly still. Absolutely calm. I could hear an intense rushing sound of electronics in my ears, like static and crickets getting more and more intense and louder and louder, yet behind it all was this surreal intense silence, and these two states, this rushing frantic chaotic intensity approaching the speed of light and this perfect solid, calm stillness co-existed absolutely perfectly and with no friction between them. I watched myself perfectly calmly as my mind approached this electronic wall of white light. It was absolute zen.
I was sitting in front of my beautiful 27inch imac screen. And my mind was entirely focused on my little space, which is at the bottom of a clock tower in a beautiful old victorian building in London, which is a Buddhist centre. I have just bought a beautiful big black comfortable chair, in which I can sit cross legged, upright at my computer desk. My computer is this incredible thing of awe to me, and these objects completely dominate my feelings of comfort, that is to say, they represent a kind of material perfection for me, but also, more deeply, the computer and the internet, our new technology, Peer to Peer and bitcoin, the cult of macintosh, all this represents some kind of evolutionary gateway to me, as if thinking along these lines, we as a species could disappear completely into electronic space, into I-space, into the matrix, or psyopolis, and I've also been thinking a lot about distributed identity and global sovereignty, so my spiritual ideas are all very much here, based at this point. Not to mention the fact of living at the base of a clock tower in a Buddhist centre: it was as if I were at the centre of time and totally zen, as I said above, perhaps as if I were in the eye of the storm (which I am in terms of where my life is right now�but anyway I digress).
Do you know that scene in the matrix where Neo meets 'The Architect'? The walls are panelled with TV screens and there are cuts where he looks at himself in the screen and then the camera goes through the screen into another parallel reality where the conversation is continued? That's very much like the place I got to in infinity. I was talking to God, very directly, very personally, very intimately, being myself absolutely, and also being all of consciousness, all of the world, and all of time. I was talking to God, very directly, very personally, very intimately, being myself absolutely, and also being all of consciousness, all of the world, and all of time.