DOSE:
5.0 mg
smoked
5-MeO-DMT
(powder / crystals)
BODY WEIGHT:
145 lb
This was my first 5-MeO-DMT experience, and I certainly had some trepidation before doing it. I was blessed to have an experienced, sensitive and very wise guide to watch over me. I learned many things from her both about this amazing substance and about the world in general. So I would like to pass that information on to you.
There is a lot of discussion about dosage, since this substance is both dose sensitive and smokable quantities are so small (5-10mg). She told me that it is difficult to smoke too much if I smoke it the right way, so I don�t have to be so exact in my measurements. This substance absolutely requires one have a babysitter, especially since it acts so quickly and it's easy to drop the pipe and burn oneself and not even know it. So always do this with an assistant, who can preferably help with the last hit or two.
The first thing is to put in the material about the size of a matchstick head. This works out to around 5-10mg, which is more than enough for most people to go all the way. The next thing is to light it for a few seconds to fill the pipe with smoke, and then began to pull the smoke in very slowly, like a slow count to 7� all the while having a partner continue vaporizing the material. Hold the smoke for at least 10 seconds if possible. Then take another slow hit and repeat the above. By this point the effects may be coming on very quickly, stopping here one may result in a sub-threshold experience. So if it's possible to continue to use will power to remain present and take another hit as above, the material will take over very soon no matter what anyway and it won�t be possible to take any more. By doing it slowly with this counting procedure, it prevents taking in too much. So this is about both pace and technique.
Next is setting. We did this outdoors on a mild summer day in a remote, green, beautiful and tranquil area. I have always preferred the outdoors while tripping, and I heard that this is the best place to do 5MeO, as long as my body is in a safe resting place, and there is someone to watch over me. Most people I know like to trip at night. I like to trip in the daytime. For me it�s more inviting, warm and reassuring. With a full-blown 5MeO trip I completely leave this universe of time, space, matter and any memory of having been me. And when I come back it can be quite a shock to re-discover my three dimensionality and humanness, so 'ask yourself where you want to come back to.' Ok, on to my experience.
I never got past the second inhale, and I was off. I knew this experience is about letting go, and I did just that, only a little too soon. So I never took that third toke to go all the way. Nevertheless I had the most powerfully sublime experience of my life. I was amazed at how quickly, yet smoothly I left this space and went into an entirely different one. I have read many trip reports saying it is almost impossible to describe. I will do my best, and perhaps because I didn�t go all the way I�m able to do that.
With a few seconds after my second dose, I went entirely into this new place � it was deeply significant, exponentially synchronistic, ancient, present, future were wall one. There was no time, rather a multiplicating web of cross-connected meaning. There was no visuals exactly, it was more than any visual could ever describe. There was light though; this place was filled with white light, a kind of multidimensional shifting light that corresponded with all the interpenetrating synchronicities. I could see my whole life up to that point having come to an end, and I crossed this threshold into something else. I never thought I died; so much as I would never, ever be the same again. I definitely had the feeling this time I really did it. I have gone too far, I have now entered some deep, complex shamanistic initiation that has revealed to me the true meaning of all that is, that everything that I thought I knew was wrong, that this very alien, yet deeply synchronistic, threatening, but beautiful space is what I needed to surrender too.
It suddenly occurred to me that everything I was, everything I have done, everything that was previously meaningful, everything that I have ever know will never come back. I was faced with this utter annihilation. I started to deeply cry, feeling this horrible, heart-aching reaching back to hold on to what I loved most, my wife, and feeling I would never see her again. And them I remembered that I needed to let go, to die. And so I breathed deeply, trying to surrender, and then I reached out to my wonderful guide to see if she could help me let go. And then I realized I was coming back. I remembered who I was, that I was here, and that I wouldn�t loose my wife, that my life was coming back. And then right there, that moment, I wept deeper than I have in my whole life. I felt the deepest sense of gratitude and love for my existence, for my blessed and wonderful guide. She extended deep compassion towards me, she held me in her arms, and I continued to weep as she provided the most nourishing support a guide could ever give, deep spiritual connectedness and union. I continued to cry and express the deepest gratitude I had in my whole life, love for both my guide and my wife.
I also realized how much pain and paranoia I have been hanging on to for so long. What my guide calls cycles. I went through this deep cleansing of these fears, paranoias, and aches, and felt more and more cleansed each moment. It was deeply beautiful, religious. I felt reborn, or as my guide likes to say � reset.
This is an amazing experience. I would say I got about as far as you can go without going all the way. It was as if I was striding the fence between this world and the other. For a few timeless seconds I was in this way-out indescribable space. At was as if I slid into this other completely separate dimension and then slid back soon afterwards. Had I take the third hit fully, I have no doubt I would have gone all the way and had something to akin to what other people have described with this substance.
I now have very deep respect for this substance, and I do plan on trying it again before too long. One thing that struck me was that this experience came on so quickly, yet so smoothly, as if we are designed for it, and that right now is the time for those who are ready to move into these other spaces, and to become humble servants to wherever it's taking us through this current transitional period, through the bottleneck of the coming singularity. I now have faith that we are going to make it. Although there may well be lots of deaths, maybe even a world plague or some other awful catastrophe, we humans, our consciousness legacy will continue. Our descendants will look back on us with deep gratitude for having been around right now, ushering humanity, transhumanity through this threshold into something glorious. I'm no longer afraid of that. I now feel my life is meaningful. I feel deeply grateful to be alive.
Exp Year: 2004ExpID: 34750 Gender: Male Age at time of experience: Not Given Published: Jul 13, 2005Views: Not Supported [ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
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