DOSE:
7 glasses
oral
Alcohol - Beer/Wine
600 mg
oral
DXM
(pill / tablet)
3 glasses
oral
Alcohol - Beer/Wine
BODY WEIGHT:
155 lb
I am a recovering alcoholic and have abused prescription drugs as well. I have a history of depression, anxiety, ADHD, and executive functioning issues. This was probably my fifth experience tripping on DXM over the course of about six years. DXM is the only hallucinogen I�ve ever done. My dosage on my previous trips ranged from about 200 to 400 mg, and I never went beyond the second plateau.
This DXM trip, like all my previous trips, occurred during an alcohol relapse during which I was in a fairly negative mindset. Since I am used to being in control of my experiences, DXM both scares and fascinates me. Alcohol helps get me into a relaxed mindset before tripping. Unlike in previous experiences, I spend much of this trip with the lights on. Normally, I�m a bit worried about having intense visual hallucinations and believe that any hallucinations will be milder if it�s dark.
The day of the trip, I wake up late with a hangover and a general sense of malaise, as I have the previous several days. I have about 3/4 of a bottle of wine left from the previous day and begin drinking at around 4:00 p.m. At 6:30 p.m. I buy two more bottles of wine. An hour or so later, I go to the pharmacy to pick up some stuff and then get takeout. While I�m in the pharmacy, I think, �Eh, fuck it,� and decide to buy two 20-count bottles of 15 mg DXM Tussin capsules (600 mg in total). I get home and around 11:00 p.m. take the DXM capsules over the course of 30 minutes. I�ve consumed seven glasses of wine by then. I am alone essentially throughout the trip, as I have been during all previous DXM trips.
T+0:00 to T+0:30. I take the capsules. I am a bit drunk and in a bad mood while arguing with my girlfriend on the phone. The argument is about the fact that I relapsed on alcohol. In my drunkenness, I also acknowledge that I�ve been having some trouble shaking residual feelings I have for a friend I broke off contact with several months earlier due to said feelings, which tend to come out when I am drunk. I also mention that I�ve taken some over-the-counter recreational drugs. I am binge-watching the TV show �Friday Night Lights,� which proves relevant. In my experience, DXM takes a long time to hit me, so I�m not really thinking about it at all. I do not have any particular expectations of the trip.
T+0:30 to T+5:00. My time is spent lying on the couch, divided between watching �Friday Night Lights� and surfing the Internet. Over the course of this period, I consume another two or three glasses of wine. A few hours in, I start thinking about the DXM and wondering whether it�s kicked in/ why it hasn�t. The delayed onset of perceptible DXM effects may be attributable to my alcohol intoxication.
I spend some time reading about DXM on the internet. I�m trying to get a better sense of what to expect. 600 mg is far more than I�ve ever taken. I�m feeling a combination of mild nervousness and excitement. For me, hallmarks of DXM intoxication include a virtual inability to read due to blurriness in my near vision and closed-eye visualizations (CEVs). I pull up an online copy of The Great Gatsby to test out my reading vision. I sense little to no impairment. No CEVs either.
I tell myself I need to resolve things with my girlfriend and forget about this former friend once and for all. I decide that the �theme� of my DXM trip will be forgetting about this other girl and redirecting those feelings into affection for my girlfriend. I think I got this �theme� idea from my first DXM trip, when I got into a repetitive thought loop that is difficult to remember/articulate.
T+5:00 to T+7:00. I find myself pausing �Friday Night Lights� frequently. I�ve largely lost interest in/the ability to focus on it and spend most of my mental energy trying to monitor DXM effects, still wondering if it�s really kicked in. Each time I pause the show, I get lost in thought. I�m not subjectively aware of strong effects and feel disappointed/like nothing much is going to happen.
T+7:00 to T+12:00. I peak during this period. I find that reading is blurrier, and I start to notice CEVs. I play music on my phone. For reasons I still don�t understand, no matter how many times I hit the next song button, my music app cycles among only three songs: �Sweet Jane� by Velvet Underground, �Sweet Dreams� by Eurythmics, and �Sweet Caroline� by Neil Diamond. The music is vivid and immersive, and I feel as though I live inside the songs. I listen to these songs repeatedly, particularly �Sweet Jane� (which I have always found trippy and associate with DXM), and find the music endlessly fascinating. Time is extraordinarily difficult to quantify. I keep checking the time but each time have trouble remembering what time it was the last time I checked. Minutes feel like hours. It�s very possible I only cycled through the songs a few times.
As is typical for me with DXM, every object in my surroundings takes on a human/living creature quality. Nothing is talking to me, and the shapes don�t really change or anything, I just sense they are animate. There are a bunch of objects and bottles on the coffee table in front of me. They seem like some sort of audience. every object in my surroundings takes on a human/living creature quality. Nothing is talking to me, and the shapes don�t really change or anything, I just sense they are animate. There are a bunch of objects and bottles on the coffee table in front of me. They seem like some sort of audience.