Mescaline has always been a really powerful and gentle experience to me. Today I took some san pedro. I ground it into powder and I mixed it with chocolate last night, so this morning I ate 3 out of 5 of these chocolate balls I'd made. I could only manage three. They were the worst chocolates I've ever eaten haha. Holy fuck. They tasted BAD.
When it came on I felt the presence of mother nature??? Like woah.... and I felt part of it. So I'm doing some gentle DIY work on my house with my partner and I was having a really really pleasant time. Like I'm autistic and I have sensory needs... like sometimes I need squeezing n stuff like that. But it felt like nature was taking care of all my sensory needs for me.
And this is where shit gets powerful. I have an aunt who passed away the other year and I could feel her presence and she told me we've never ever been apart and she showed me how much she loved me and OH MY GOD.... I felt sooooooo much love that it was painful and too much for a human to experience. She told me about the afterlife and what happens to people and all she said was "A book opened is never closed". And now I know all the people I've loved who are no longer here physically are here with me forever and I truly do get to love them forever and ever. That amount of love is overwhelming man. Wow.
She stayed with me for about an hour. I'm a musician and I've been struggling to find my voice through my years but I'm really starting to find what it is that's me, but she told me my purpose in life is to sing because it brings joy to people. And that's just the most comforting thing I think I've ever experienced in my whole life. I can't believe my aunt was just with me for so long and talking directly to me and showing me so much love.
Do what you love to do in life and don't let anything hold you back because it really really really fucking matters.
I've taken mescaline a whole bunch of times and nothing like this has ever happened before but it's just changed my perception of everything. I'm so thankful for existence.
Go do your thing whoever you are and don't fear those who judge because those who judge are only doing it to themselves. Be the light that you are.