I don't remember a single night in years where I hadn't had a drink. I would consider myself a functional alcoholic. I exercise regularly, guess I'm doing fine with work. I guess I just made efforts at work thinking I'll reward myself with a drink at night. I had this constant feeling of guilt all the time and I just wouldn't admit that I have a problem.
Every night I just needed a drink. I would even freak out if there was some situation where I couldn't get to drink a certain night. I have been in a constant state of depression for years and can't remember when I was last happy. I have become reclusive, have zero social life and all I want to do is just drink alone.
I would drink 3 drinks per night, but of late I realized I was having 5-6 regularly. I guess I was so depressed that I just didn't care. I started noticing a slight discomfort around my right abdomen and decided to stop.
It's been 2 days that I stopped now and I noticed a pretty big difference. I got so much work done. I could really hit it hard in the gym. I cooked my meals rather than just ordering in.
Mind is still a bit cloudy though. Still a bit depressed. Hope it gets better tomorrow. Wish me luck!