I have a headache and I'm fucking annoyed. I hate this shit and I hate myself even more. I guess that's why I'm still using. Self harm, maybe. I mean, isn't that what we're doing, ultimately and literally. I was pretty much predisposed to self destruct, but this... This is not how I imagined it would be.
I know a lot of you are in a better place with your drug use and maybe you're annoyed by posts like this. But I encourage you to take a look into what could be your future. I'm not trying to rain on anyone's meth parade, but I'd advise everyone to keep an umbrella handy.
See, I thought I had nothing to lose when I did meth for the first time. I was depressed, stressed, desperately needing to escape reality. You have more to lose than you think. I know I did.
The first thing you'll lose will probably be a couple pounds. Next, you start to lose your concept of time. You'll find yourself asking 'is that clock right?' Your days will turn into what I refer to as 'double days' and before you know it you've missed all of football season because you never even know what day it is.
This is where you lose your job, assuming you had one when you started. But you hated that job anyway, so fuck it. You'll probably lose a few friends, as meth is generally frowned upon. Pretty soon, you're broke. So you have to find some sort of hustle.
Essentially you spend your high hustling up the next one. Which takes the fun out of it, but at this point it's your job. It's your life. And all of a sudden you're one of them.